Written June 26, 2006

I can't do this.
I can't be awake, not awake and alone.
I can't be here without someone to catch me when I fall.

I need to be treated tenderly.
I need to be held just to know someone's there.

Written May 31, 2006

I give up on the dog.
He's not mine,
Not yours, mine...ours.
I'm not something familiar and missed,
I'm something new and terrifying,
Something to scare the piss out of him.

The reunion wasn't sweet and breathless,
Just frustration and a mess.
He wouldn't even look at me,
Too scared of the stranger who knew his name.
The treats were unrewarding,
My soft voice unable to soothe or control.
He just sat there full of fear
And I full of confirmation that it's over.

I'd hoped he'd help me
Slow the spiral of change,
Remind me of the importance.